Life Hacks: Sweetheart Edition

Love is in the air, everyone! Can you smell it? Oh… Sorry. What you are currently smelling may just be my “love” of fried cheese.

  • Ladies, there’s no better Valentines Gift than to buy him a sports jersey of his favorite team and present it to him wearing it…and nothing else.
    And if he doesn’t like sports, I don’t know, just touch him in his bathing suit area.
  • We like to tell people that if we had a time machine, we’d go back and kill Hitler but the reality is most of us would just go back to our middle school days and deal with some of those hair styles and outfits.
  • Remember the good old days when ugly people made music too?
  • Crazy that as a society, we’ve said it’s acceptable to put tree blood on our batter cakes and consume it.
  • If you ever want to feel like “The Man” just get an old Speak and Spell toy off of eBay and repeatedly hit the “O” button.
  • Remember Guys, times are tough. It’s a smart financial move to figure out the minimal amount of Valentines gifts that will get you laid.
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